Friday, May 25, 2007

Act 1 Scene 2

--- HOUSEKEEPING ---
Please come to Wharf 2 in Walsh Bay next Saturday afternoon for the first ever Sydney Writer's Festival Zine Fair. It is there you will find my first pretentious publication, entitled "As Curious An Entity..." I have a table booked to sell stuff with the Sammiches guys and girl, and a few other people selling zines and things. They're well cheap anyway, but I'll give free copies to everybody that has ever left a comment on this blog - you can pay if you want though, my employment status remains shaky. The artwork and publishing stuff was done by our good friends at Crafternoon, and token BCorTM celebrity Steve scored two guest spots (one mentions gay people)... Seriously thanks hey but. J.
--- AND SHIT, HEY ---

THE KITCHEN, 7PM WEDNESDAY: Simmo is propped up at the breakfast bar drinking a PET bottle of Tooheys Extra Dry. He's had a tough day work at Vintage Cellars and is noticeably worn out. $1.40 Coke Man is defrosting a Lean Cuisine lasagne for two.

$1.40: Yeah, I'm just defrosting this lasagne for me and you to eat for dinner, Simmo. You don't need to cook it, just defrost it then put it in the oven, 15 minutes only.
Simmo: (nods, stares at his beer)
$1.40: Some people like to cook dinner out of ingredients.
Simmo: (raises his eyebrow silently saying, "if you don't redeem yourself in the next sentence, you have officially just verbalised the most irrelevant non-observation in the entire universe.")
$1.40: ... I just eat these lasagnes, you just defrost them and heat them up, 15 minutes, that all it takes. Yeah, only 15 minutes."

Simmo gulps the last of his beer before standing, dropping the empty bottle in the recycling bin and walking straight out of the kitchen.

$1.40 is left pacing around the kitchen.

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