Great Humanitarians Of Our Time: Garret, Healey , Ross-Edwards

From: James Ross-Edwards
To: savebarkercricket@hotmail.com
Cc: reception@barker.nsw.edu.au, jeremy_von_einem@barker.nsw.edu.au, prudence_rogers@barker.nsw.edu.au, matthew_macoustra@barker.nsw.edu.au, hm@barker.nsw.edu.au, heather_graham@barker.nsw.edu.au, john_mock@barker.nsw.edu.au, peter_miller@barker.nsw.edu.au, colin_reid@barker.nsw.edu.au, len_nixon@barker.nsw.edu.au, newsdesk@smh.com.au, newsdesk@theage.com.au, newsroom@news.com.au, hugh.martin@news.com.au, Peter.Garrett.MP@aph.gov.au
Subject: SAVING BARKER CRICKET?
Sent: Tuesday, 24 October 2006 9:06:53 AM


To those campaigning to SAVE BARKER CRICKET,

Never have I received an email forward that has been sent to such a high calibre of Barker personalities, it really is the who´s who. Kudos, savebarkercricket@hotmail.com. I also liked what you did with the red sign, I honestly nearly shed red and blue tears of nostalgia. What a great idea to let Peter Garret know about your valiant crusade as well. I´m not sure about the MPs politics now, but I'm pretty sure I remember a Midnight Oil song that championed the tradition of a male-only cricket team, or was it Indigenous land rights?... I always forget, great band though!

I'm frightfully concerned to hear that Barker cricket is under attack, when I read the subject I thought it may have been terrorists or (far less likely) a lack of funding and resources. Imagine my shock when I read that Barket cricket needs to be saved by... a schoolgirl who happens to be talented enough to play with the boys.

Is this particular girl going to really destroy the game? Or just bruise a few egos of old, conservative Barker/cricket tragics who can't seem to see the role of the female on No. 1 Oval as venturing past The Marks Pavilion cutting oranges.

Perhaps still being in a post-adolescent stage of rebellion, I don't like to say this to the school I went to (and loved, nearly always), but to whoever is in charge of cricket - good on you. I'm sure this girl deserves her place in the team, even if it means a few whingeing old boys, and one poor kid feels emasculated for a few weeks in the seconds... It's probably a good lesson anyway, it happens alot in the future - just try studying any tertiary level humanities.

I thank you for alerting me to this problem. And in the future if Barker cricket ever comes under serious threat again: fire/flood/famine. Please, do not hesitate to contact me, I will gladly help: water/bucket/bread.

Yours sincerely,
James Ross-Edwards, Class of 2002

The end for Jeremy.

Jeremy, yet again, sat on that balcony, judging everything that walked by, from plastic bags to men dressed solely by Material Boi. Before he could even think about pondering and analysing who was a wanker, and who was not, his life flashed before his eyes. The reason for this was uncertain, but soon became relevant. Jeremy was dead. He had been killed by a man, dressed solely by Material Boi, mind, who had made use of the most beautiful plastic bag he had ever seen to strangle him. Jeremy's last thought was about nothing, as he was pondering, because, as many had picked up on, Jeremy was a wafty character with a rubbishy name, and deserved death.


Noone cared. People were relieved to know that Jeremy had nothing to do with James Ross-Edwards, a great man, who just happened to share the same balcony in a parallel universe with a fictitious wanker whose rapid shoot to prominence was matched equally with his demise.